I am constantly asked by Parents. . .
“My son, daughter wants to be in the music business. . .what should I do?”
Send them to Law School, Take Business Classes, Finance, Ride a bike, Learn Feng Shui. Whatever it is, enjoy what your doing. To the best of my knowledge, the best thing we can do is guide them in the direction of their passion. If they have a true passion, and everyone does, the trick is to figure out what that is and how they can use it in their lives.Their direction, adventure and purpose usually falls into place.
Here are some things as a Parent that I do to help them Keep On Keeping On . . . If they listen!
1. Keep alive the reason for what they do which becomes a most difficult task and burden.
2. Cross your fingers that you can be there when the emotional rollercoaster is affecting their very core to the point of incapacity to move in any direction.
3. Be the broken record about the safety from substances and people that dangle the carrot of endless possibility with its use. The industry is full of predators and can get overwhelming.
4. Keep an eye on their financial solvency so that the decisions they make are without moral, financial or career compromise.
5. Keeping your judgements and “I told you so’s” down to a minimum. The I told you so’s serve our egos and do not benefit their situation.
Its simply common sense STUFF that gets forgotten for the sake of success. I try to help my children and those artists I mentor moving forward even in the face of adversity and *failure. *failure. . something you tried that doesn’t work right now…please try again later.
I would rather try and fail rather then fail for not trying.
At least the failures that come from trying give me some insight. It’s become more difficult to get true intel on what’s working for us and what’s not today. In this industry “No” is a word we hear more frequently than most anything else. It’s Sad but a fact of life. I remember the call backs after the audition letting me know that they were going with someone else because. . . . what came after the because was invaluable if you listened carefully. I understand that it became almost impossible for companies to call thousands of applicants. I’m just making the point that we’re slowly loosing the ability to get insight in order to improve. As one Casino owner once told me, “I’m not in the business of making stars nor helping them understand why their not.” It’s harsh but hearing that helped me understand the need for a personal great team who will tell me the truth. Make sure those you surround yourself with have the knowledge, understanding and motivation to assist you and not their best interest. As a Parent, be part of that team and make sure the decisions are ultimately made by the son/daughter.
Key points I live by:
1. I strive to develop, master and take responsibility for all my actions and decisions.
2. I stay away from getting excited and confusion is dangerous during important negotiations.
3 I try not to allow my temper to interfere or dictate my decision making.
4. I try never to make decisions in haste.
5. I make those decisions final and never do anything half way.
6. I make sure to be honest with myself and others when it comes to all my dealings.
7. I emphasize/imprint every decision I make in my mind and live up to them every day.
I realize none of this is easy but it’s all something to strive for because to me it’s all about the journey.
Bottom Line: If someone has a true passion for the music business, nothing will hold that passion back. They may not become a professional musician but that passion will permeate their lives. My Parents were not in the music industry nor did they have any understanding of it. I woke up to the thought of music and went to bed with the thought of music. I played with musical instruments as an infant. Music was always there. I remember all the decisions that I made that took me down different path. The choices, some of which would have brought me greater fame and fortune, would have made me a different person. Rewind. . . remember. . . NO REGRETS. Just keep this in mind, It’s A Time Game. When your young, energy is plentiful, there are less responsibilities, your focused. The industry is looking for young exploitable talented artists. Yes, I said that out loud. As we age, our responsibilities, perceptions, aspirations and outlooks change. I was given the opportunity to be part of one of the TV Music Competition Shows years back. They required me to stay for a period of 3-6 months at their disposal without pay. It would have been necessary to cancel a great deal of work, find lodging and cover 6 months of living expenses. If I reached the finals, a small stipend would be payed but certainly not enough to cover costs. The opportunity could have certainly resulted in an increase of fame and fortune and I needed to make a decision. I decided that the venture would have depleted a great deal of savings, caused an undeniable financial strain on my wife and children, caused a loss of clients due to cancelation. I know, without a doubt that had this opportunities presented itself when I was young, there would have been no hesitation.
Encourage them while they’re young and seek out every opportunity. That doesn’t mean that you stop the encouragement at any specific age.
The great news is that the industry has changed and allows an artist, through self release, social media, competitions like (Wherever You Live’s) Got Talent, Idol Shows and more that give incredible possibilities. There is a greater possibility today to become the next Justin Bieber or Taylor Swift than when I started. We live in a great period for artists. . .
Remember
1. Encourage them to learn and give them the ability to become the best at whatever they choose. 2. Help them build their music business team and be a part of it and listen.
3. Try to get them an overall understanding of contract law.
4. Instill the foundation of Trusting their instincts.
5. Provide an understanding of how the financial world works.
6. Demonstrate the importance of healthy living and how to organize it all into each day.
7. Guide them to evaluation of what they truly want in life and not fear change.
I strive to leave each day better than I found it. . .Tony